My Mech graphic novel story

So a while back I wanted to write and draw a graphic novel. I came up with an awsome and very detailed idea. Im curious though what you guys think of it. Give it a read through and tell me what you think.

Story Outline: main elements

The Hephaestus

   Ship Scale
*Large generational ship (about 5000 crew members)
*Capable of self reproduction

   AI system
*NOVA AI Female AI that controls the automation of the ship (very similar to the Andromeda AI) Has personnel relationships with the crew can take complete control of the ship if needs be

Power
*Three central generators each connected to the other raising power output by a factor of three
*Multiple smaller backup generators dispersed throughout the ship
*Solar power generation (solar panels)
*Thermal power generation (Wankle engine, Thermocouple generators)

Construction
*Large Molecular furnace (can create nearly anything at the cost of massive power requirements)
*Mining skiffs (small shuttles that aide the ship in material gathering)
*Thousands of spider bots (the size of a small dog maintain the ship and interact with the crew)
*Golems (larger bots to assist the spiders with larger tasks)
*Construction bays (all close to the outer hull each services either mechs bots exo-armor or the ship)

Weapons and Defenses
Note (These vary based upon the ships current operational status)
* Point defense (Gatling cannons, HILIS (high intensity laser interception system))
*Ship to ship (Varying types of particle and solid state cannons)
*Siege (4 linear accelerators fire any manner of projectile as long as it is loaded into a launcher sabot. can even fire a cluster of mechs for long range multipurpose missions)
*Electromagnetic Barrier shield (prevents interference from stellar radiation)
*Multi layer pressure hull (Up to 5 layers of pressurized hull protect the ship. These layers are honeycombed with hull support systems and passages for spiders to conduct repairs)

Support Logistics
*Decentralized living areas (Quarters are spread all throughout the ship. Crewmen generally stay in quarters near their work areas)
*Recreational areas (These include gyms, gardens, sports centers, arenas, viewing areas, and multiple other undevoted areas for miscellaneous use)
*Biological support (Food production and waste processing mostly handled by miniaturized molecular furnaces although gardens provide naturally grown produce)
*Medical (Med bays are scattered throughout the ship and can support anything from a small cut to large scale injuries most are near construction areas and hangar bays to reduce response time to mechanics and pilots)

Mech/Exo Armor
*Both are considered normal among the crews society
*It is greatly encouraged that the crew experiment and personally develop their own individual Exo armor
*Mech provide the main combat force of the Hephaestus (each is maintained by its pilot and a dedicated mech crew. They also are allowed a high degree of freedom in personalized designs but have to get special permission to change the core frame of a mech)

Back story
The Hephaestus was the first ship of its kind. The ship was designed by the Humans of the Hoga’s Ring Galaxy to be an all purpose ship capable of filling nearly every role their fleet could need. By the time the second ship of this design came off the assembly lines the Hephaestus had all ready changed so drastically it could no longer be classified as the same ship. In this year the ship had completed its trial shakedown. It had successfully mined an asteroid belt then used those resources to build a small fleet. It intervened in an interplanetary conflict between two warring factions providing support for the injured and destroyed worlds. The ship also proved its exploration abilities by surveying yet unexplored areas of the Hoga Galaxy. It left self produced ASI’s (automated scientific instrumentation) to continue gathering information on these areas. The ship is currently preparing its next subspace jump to survey sector 2532.

Hephaestus crew (Main Characters)

Commander – Abdon
Chief engineer – Chief Odle
Medical chief - Nadine
Pilots – Travis,
Spiders – Mack,

Planet in sector 2523 races

Machine race - Sentient race of interconnected machines originally created by the humans from their planet

Characteristics

*Multitude of different designs all have specific purposes
*Central controlling AI but each unit can act independently of the hole
*Individual construction facilities produce hundreds of units per day
*Limited power generation abilities (reason they haven’t already taken over)
*Cannot quickly create high level technology due to limits humanity had in technology at the time of the machine takeover
*Machine considers organic material inferior will not utilize genetic technology (Once destroyed a machine product line because its design was too organic)
*All though the central intelligence dislikes organic life it goes to great lengths to preserve the planet (For unknown reasons)

Machine race (Main Characters)

Main control AI -
Multiple individual machines - character based on class of machine

Mutant race – Once humanoids became mutated beasts through massive overuse of genetic modification

   Characteristics

*Created the machines
*Fought a losing battle against them eventually turning to science for an answer
*Experimented with genetics creating advanced humans that could more effectively fight the machines
*Progressed too fast in their genetic experiments losing their humanity in the process

Physical traits
*Grown larger that their original human form
* Magnetic organs
*Perfect iron exoskeletons that can be reshaped, shifted, and reformed with the magnetic organs
*Chemical weaponry (projectile weapons - use chemicals and once fired the healed over scab becomes another projectile)
*Aggressive animal instinct
*High speed adaptive evolution

Note: A few half human half mutants have been able to retain their sanity. They group in the remaining structures left behind attempting to find a way to put an end to the conflict and save humanity from its self inflicted curse.

Mutant race (Main characters)
½ mutant human characters - met later in the story
Creatures - many different types but all have similar characteristics

Story:
(Graphic Novel)

Book one (Write in comic form)

   The Hephaestus began its jump to the next sector on its voyage. During the jump an error occurred in the jump computer changing the output coordinates. The Hephaestus exited jump space in the atmosphere of a planet. After crash landing on the surface the ship’s crew attempts to recover.

Engineers begin to assess the damage and the ship commander sends out a flight of mechs to scout the immediate area. Mechs spot a fight between the mutants and machines. The mechs are unwillingly drawn into the fight. One mech is destroyed while the others retreat and report on what they have found.

   Chief engineer reports that ship power output has been severely limited. Two of the three main generators have been damaged and nearly the entire outer hull on the belly of the ship needs repair to make the craft space worthy.

   Mechs return to the ship and report what they have found. During this report the ship is attacked by the machines. The Hephaestus survives the attack (Fights with Mech and point defense weapons leaving nothing to analyze). More personnel are injured and several others are killed.

   The Commander has his engineers make defense their top priority. They activate auxiliary power generators and ensure the point defense systems are fully functional. The ship also has at least 2 flights of mechs on continuous combat standby.

   At the end of the first book the commander is conferring with the ship AI about the situation. He leaves the AI core room. The AI NOVA turns and seems to be looking at something in the distance. She is being called by someone.

Book Two (Write in comic form)

   In order to affect repairs the engineers would need material. The immediate priority was repairing the main generators. If the ships molecular furnace was at full strength the crew wouldn’t have any problem repairing the ship. It would allow them to easily fabricate replacement parts. The commander sends several flights of scout mech out to scan for usable material.

   The chief engineer (Odle) arrives at generator 2 and briefs the work crew. Spiders are buzzing all around them busying themselves with their tasks. The Chief calls his spider and gives him orders to spread amongst the others. He tells them to prepare several of the maintenance bays for manual construction of parts and equipment. The spider (Mack) leaves and gathers up many others to begin his assigned task.

   Captain Travis while eager to let loose the upgrades he had made to his mech was still recovering from the shared tragedy that had befallen the Hephaestus crew. His mech flight had scanned most of the surrounding area and had found nothing of consequence. The captain’s wingman contacted Travis telling him he had detected large deposits of iron ore. Travis knew the grease monkeys would love getting their hands on all that ore. So he had his flight go in for a closer look.

   Commander Abdon arrived on the command deck of the Hephaestus. Curious he inquired on the status of the mechs out on patrol. Sir flights two has discovered what they think used to be an abandoned town. Flight one has not encountered anything substantial to report on. Flight three reports they have detected a large deposit of iron ore and they are moving closer to investigate. Have Major Warrens flight check over the town then continue on. Flight three that’s Captain Travis right? Tell him to proceed with caution. Nova scanned the immediate area with the ships sensors several hours ago and didn’t detect any substantial resources.

   As the captains flight reached the source of the iron readings he couldn’t believe what he saw. He contacted the Hephaestus and described an ant hill like structure. According to his readings it was made almost entirely of iron. He also noted that there were many destroyed machines around the perimeter just beyond an empty mote surrounding the structure. Telling his wingmen to hold position Travis decided to land. He set down in the mote between the ruined machines and structure. As he examined the machines his sensors warned him of a large concentration of subterranean movement nearby. A second later several creatures leapt at his mech. What the hell are these things? Bravo Charlie get down here now! Travis was able to destroy one of the creatures with his main weapon the blast but the others made it to his position. They latched themselves magnetically to his mech attempting to destroy it. His wingmen touched down and ripped the creatures from his armor. Once he was free Travis blew both creatures to pieces. The ant hill was now awake and aware of the intruders. Creatures began pouring out of the hill heading for the three pilots. Um Sir don’t you think we should be getting out of here? Travis knew they were in trouble but couldn’t pass up the opportunity for Intel. Bravo pick up that creatures corpse. Alpha help me carry this machine. The creatures began firing at them. Wait these things have guns? Maximum thrust let’s get the hell out of here.

Book Three (Write in comic form)

As Captain Travis approached the Hephaestus he contacted the bridge. Sorry to drop in on you like this sir we have been having communications problems. I thinks it’s because of our cargo. The Commander was still on the bridge. Captain what do you mean cargo? Sir we encountered hostiles. It appears that the Iron deposit was a hive constructed by unknown creatures. We moved in for a close investigation and were attacked. We are currently transporting a deceased creature and an inactive machine from the site. I understand Captain we will prepare a hangar for you, NOVA will guide you in.

The commander contacted the medical bay. Doctor Nadine I need you to prepare a research and autopsy team and meet our incoming flight at the designated hangar. Sir I still have injured patients down here. Doctor your staff can handle that I need your talents elsewhere. Now prepare an autopsy team I will have a combat team on standby in the hangar for you. What do you mean combat team? Better safe than sorry ma’am.

In the hangar Captain Travis remained in his mech. His wingmen had already dismounted